Back in my day, we didn't have "Aeldari" or "Asuryani" or even "Eldar". Hear that? Not even Eldar. We had SPACE ELVES. And that was good enough for us. Just plain old Space Elves. We didn't need fancypants names stolen from the glossary in the Silmarillion. That's because we had guts. We got by with nothing but Elves. In space. With shuriken catapults.
There were no good elves and bad elves. There were just elves. Sometimes they helped you and sometimes they raided your homeworld and incinerated your family. But we didn't bellyache about it or go around calling them "Drukhari" or nuthin'. What a bunch of lightweights you guys are. When a bee stings you on your knuckle, is it a Dark Bee? Was it seduced by Slannesh? Yeah - that's what I thought. Go make a Tic Tac video about it.
Aspect Warriors? Just keep talking, Einstein. Ask a proper Space Elf about their aspect, and before you can say "Jiminy Cricket", you'll find a pointy chainmail slipper lodged three feet up your intestinal tract.
And for Chrissakes, don't call them "Guardians". Our Space Elves didn't guard shit. They were mercenaries. Or pirates. Or bounty hunters. If you want a guardian, read the newspaper and stop bothering me.
So now you understand. In the good old days, we didn't have rap music. We had precisely one record, and it wasn't even a record. It was a 7" flexi disc of Sabbat playing Blood for the Blood God. We'd play it over and over again while talking about how AWESOME the SPACE ELVES were and how they'd certainly kick the ass of every other army in the 40K universe if only their stats were better.
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This is the second installment of my tour through the original RTO4 range of twelve Eldar, er, Space Elves. Our first miniature is "Alesia Wildfire". Like many of these Space Elves, he or she is pleasantly gender non-specific (and armed to the teeth).
Next is "Cmmr. Inghen Keentongue". It's not clear what "Cmmr." is abbreviating. Commander? Commodore? Centimeter Mister?
Third we have "Caetra Darkflight", who demonstrates the correct way to shoot from the hip. Knowledgeable readers informed me in the comments on last week's post that Caetra is carrying a laspistol (at least according to the Citadel Miniatures Blue Catalogue). I don't know about you, but that seems pretty big for a laspistol.
Our last miniature today is "Irbic Trueshot". This is a lovely sculpt that showcases the organic lines of the original Eldar. I mean Space Elves.
Thanks for dropping by - next week, we'll finish off the RTO4 range!
Oh, awesome work as always sir!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Michal!
DeleteExcellent work on the classic sculpts Matthew, takes me back to a time without army books, and a ruleset you didn't need to constantly remortgage for ! LOL
ReplyDeleteThe cost of modern miniatures still knocks my socks off. When I look at those pricetags, it makes me feel a little (a little) better about all I spend on eBay on vintage figs like these fellows.
DeleteI saw a single (plastic) GW figure for sale for $45 at my local. That is completely bananas! Literally one freaking sprue 😡🤦
DeleteFantastic painting, Matthew, again they look straight out of 'Eavy Metal! I too am old enough to remember Space Elves, and I almost bought some before falling under the Space Marine spell LOL!
ReplyDeleteI love your recent troopers and drones from Etsy, Matt.
DeleteKeep up the good work.
ReplyDeleteThanks Muskie!
DeleteI love how creepy the helmets look with the yellow and dark striped paint pattern. Makes you not want to see what's underneath (predator mouth perhaps?).
ReplyDeleteThe design of Eldar armor, especially on earlier models like these, never really said "elves" to me. I honestly get more of an aquatic vibe with the swooping curves and the fins, especially when you have the wavy camo patterns on these helmets, which remind me of the markings of tropical fish.
DeleteI agree - they do have an exotic fish feeling to them. For my part, I like this element - it makes the Eldar seem more alien.
DeleteLol
ReplyDeleteI've been showing these posts to some youngsters
I'm glad yer learnin' the yute!
DeleteRodor to Geriatricus - over -
ReplyDeleteWe really like the psychological profile of space elves that you have outlined in your last posts. They seem truly alien: Tolkien's classic elves (and their relatives from the Warhammer world) certainly have very different values from humans, but ultimately they are understandable to us (human) readers / players. The space elves are aliens, in the sense of totally different from the humans of RT (and from us), because they act according to logic incomprehensible to us. A bit like dealing with the psychology of a wild animal, which can do you no harm or tear you apart ...
- Over and out.
I will pass your message on to Geriatricus, but I strongly advise you not to pay attention to anything he says.
DeleteCentimeter Mister is now officially a Warhammer term.
ReplyDeleteSweet, sweet work, I do love them. My favourite is the last one, Trueshot, but they all look gorgeous. It's fantastic to find these paintjobs again. Old school power!
I'm so glad someone enjoyed that joke, Suber.
DeleteOh please. As if the Imperium would use metric. These are the people who still put tanks together with huge rivets in the 41st millennium. They probably use a measurement system which makes (our) imperial measures look incredibly straightforward. Like it's all based on what the Ecclesiarchy claims were the measurements of the Emperor's body.
DeleteSometimes when I want to entertain myself, I go through my old blog posts and re-read the comments you've left in ages past, Allison. They're all still fresh as dew. I was chuckling the other day about you saying (4 years ago!) about how you would never be happy until they design a pot of Nuln Oil that doesn't keep tipping over.
DeleteOh man, I started actually laughing out loud reading this. Not good because I woke up a sleeping J! Loved it
ReplyDeleteI thought you might particularly enjoy this weapons-grade grognardia, Travis.
DeleteFantastic writeup! I think the intro is definitely how a lot of us feel lol. Great paint jobs on some of my favorite models! The classic blue/yellow/silver is great. The helmet markings really make them pop. Love it!
ReplyDeleteThanks Hobbs. You wouldn't believe how many times I had to paint over the helmets to get the markings right. It's surprisingly difficult to make some thin black squiggly lines that don't look too squiggly or too thin.
DeleteOh sir, I fully understand. I did the tiger stripes on mine... That flag... I spent days on!
DeleteDo you know any active oldhammer playgroups in Toronto?
ReplyDeleteNo - although I think the UofT wargamers club (which can be found on Discord) is experimenting this year with some oldhammer projects.
Delete